Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. See that no one is sexually immoral, or is godless like Esau, who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the oldest son. Afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this blessing, he was rejected. Even though he sought the blessing with tears, he could not change what he had done. (Hebrews 12:14-17, emphasis added)
The believers who received the letter to the Hebrews were a suffering people. They were being slandered, rejected, arrested, imprisoned, and plundered by their opponents. Being Jewish, they were under great pressure to revert to the legal, non-persecuted religion of Judaism in order to escape this great suffering. The writer to the Hebrews, with great eloquence, reminds them of the greatness of the Lord Jesus and His worthiness to be trusted.
All this external suffering, however, does not mean these brothers and sisters didn't also face the pressures and sufferings that happen within a fellowship, such as immorality, conflict, and bitterness. Toward the end of the letter, the writer calls them to honor Christ not only in the face of external enemies but also in their relationships with one another.
In Hebrews 12 we have highlighted for us several bad things that can destroy us from within our Christian fellowship:
Lack of holiness/sanctification (i.e., being set apart exclusively for the Lord). The writer warns us that without holiness, we will not see God. He links this directly to "living at peace with everyone," or at least making every effort on our end.
Sexual immorality/godlessness. The writer links immorality with the godlessness of Esau, and we are warned here that giving ourselves over to such things will lead, as with Esau, to rejection and eternal regret.
Falling short of grace/bitterness. In the middle, the author links the idea of "falling short of grace" with a root of bitterness. He warns that when bitterness takes root in a fellowship, it not only causes "trouble" but it "defiles" many. It is this I want to expand upon in this email.
The result of bitterness is twofold: Trouble and defilement.
For "trouble," the author used the Greek word ἐνοχλέω (enocheleō), which carries the meaning of a crowd disturbance. So we can see that the kind of trouble that bitterness causes is not merely localized to the bitter person, but to many others.
For "defile," the Greek μιαίνω (miainō) is used, which carries the meaning of being "stained," "contaminated," "polluted," or "tainted." When used in a moral sense, as it is here, it is directly linked with the call from verse 14, "to be holy"—as to be defiled is to be made "unholy."
The stark warning to us is that bitterness not only hurts us in an emotional and relational sense, but it is directly linked to "falling short of the grace of God." To be sure, falling short of God's grace is no small thing, as it is only by grace that we are saved. The author uses the Greek ὑστερέω (hystereō) for "falls short," which carries a serious meaning in that language. It can mean "to come too late," "to be left behind," "to fail to reach the goal," and "to be devoid of." Bitterness impoverishes us of God's grace, which is a catastrophic loss.
The apostle Paul uses the same word for bitterness in his letter to the Ephesians. There, he links the presence of bitterness (along with rage, anger, brawling, slander, and every type of malice) with grieving the Holy Spirit:
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:29-32)
These sins, which grieve God's Spirit, can easily rise up among a fellowship of believers when we forget the forgiveness we have received in Christ. Yet, when we meditate on the great love and mercy we have received from God in Jesus, we will be filled by the working of the Spirit with kindness, compassion, and forgiveness toward one another.
From this, we can conclude that the presence of bitterness in our lives is a sign that something has gone very wrong in our relationship with God. It is important that we see this because bitterness has a strange power to blind us from seeing God at all—all we can think about are the people and situations we believe have hurt us. Therefore, we diminish, and our fruit changes from the fruit of the Spirit to the bitter fruit that comes from a "bitter root."
In the book of Acts, we come across Simon the sorcerer, who, despite believing in Jesus and being baptized, had brought into his new faith a heart full of bitterness, a heart that still wanted to prove himself, and Peter saw it for what it was:
Peter answered: “May your money perish with you, because you thought you could buy the gift of God with money! You have no part or share in this ministry, because your heart is not right before God. Repent of this wickedness and pray to the Lord in the hope that he may forgive you for having such a thought in your heart. For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.” (Acts 8:20-23)
Finally, and in my opinion, most terrifyingly, we come to see how personally the Lord Himself takes bitterness and unforgiveness. In Matthew 18, Jesus tells us about "the parable of the unmerciful servant."
We find a servant who owes his master the equivalent of $10,826,400,000 (10,000 talents of gold), which is obviously an unpayable debt. This is us before God, our sins being an unpayable debt. In mercy, the Master canceled the debt and set the servant free. Then that servant went from the Master and found a fellow servant who owed him about $22,000 (100 silver coins). This is us with our brothers and sisters in Christ who have wronged us in some way.
Now, the servant did not, in gratitude, follow his Master's example of mercy and instead had the man arrested and thrown in debtors' prison. The Master heard about this and summoned the unmerciful servant to come back before him, saying:
"‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed." (Matthew 18:32-34)
Then the Lord Jesus makes the link to us directly, saying:
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.” (Matthew 18:35)
Bitterness will destroy your holiness. It will defile you. It will be the source of trouble and contention among a fellowship. And, most terrifying of all, it is a personal insult to the God of grace, who has forgiven our great debt to Him with the blood of His own Son. In short, bitterness leads to God putting back on us the sins he had previously forgiven and sending us from His presence. What could be worse? What could be more terrible?
Simply put, there is nothing good about bitterness. No level of justification makes its consequences worth it for a believer in Jesus Christ. Bitterness deceives us, however, with its feelings of self-pity and self-righteousness. It feels so justifiable. And in a small sense, it is justifiable. The other servant really did owe $22,000 to the unmerciful servant. In the same way, we really are wronged at times, and people really are in a debt of forgiveness to us.
However, if we do not forgive as we have been forgiven, even our own prayers will condemn us, as we see in the Lord's prayer:
"And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." (Matthew 6:12)
The word "as" in the Lord's prayer is ὡς (hōs), which means "in the same manner," or "just as," or "just like." Therefore, the prayer should be translated:
"And forgive us our debts, in the same way we have forgiven our debtors."
And of the seven distinct prayers of the Lord's prayer, the Lord only adds a commentary to this one, as He concludes the prayer, saying:
"For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." (Matthew 6:14-15)
Friends, bitterness is a poisonous viper. We play with it at our own eternal peril. When we see it rear its ugly head in our lives, we should RUN! Run to Jesus. Run to the Cross. Recall the great mercy we have received and give it to others freely. It is our great joy to be like our precious Savior and forgive with tenderness and compassion.
Here are some resources I commend to you to reflect further on this. May the Lord help us to be free of all bitterness and full of His mercy, love, and grace. Amen.
RESOURCES FOR FURTHER HELP
Jerry Bridges, Desiring God, "Bitterness and a Demanding Spirit Threaten Faithfulness," May 22, 2023, 3:18, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eq_8FdOyu-8.
John Piper, Desiring God, "Fighting Bitterness" November 6, 2020, 8:51, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8xP4HcbnVs.
John Piper, Desiring God, "Why We Hold on to Bitterness," November 23, 2018, 10:41, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vkS4VMQ1OSI.
A.W. Tozer, Christian Sermons and Audio Books, "The Root of Bitterness," February 9, 2011, 23:23, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k6srf-pHKeo.
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George Müller
